Dear God,

I miss my brother.  I miss when we were all young, and happy.  I miss my parents reading me bedtime stories, and Andrew and Josh sneaking into my room to say "Goodnight, Boo."

Lord, how did this happen?  How did we grow up to be so different?  So far from where we started.  Grant me the power to understand how we got here.  To understand why Andrew has left us.

Each night, I close my eyes and pray to you.  I pray asking you to guide me home, to show me back to your Heavenly Kingdom, and to reunite me with Andrew... but you tell me my journey is far from over.   It feels like it's over.  I am too tired these days, God.  I pray to you for the strength to wake in the morning, but sometimes that's not enough.  Sometimes I can feel the demon sitting on my chest; he's too strong to fight when I am alone.

Some days, all that I can do is sit and wonder how much longer I will be a prisoner to this madness.  But when my love walks through the door, I feel your light enter my home once more.  How could that be?  He has no idea how much he means to me.

We used to be such a close family.  Such a loving family.  I guess we still are... but it's not the same.  A piece of the puzzle is missing, and we all know where it is
but can't get it back.  You've placed it in a spot we can't quite reach.

God... I miss my brothers and my parents.  I miss my whole family.  I miss just feeling like we were complete. These days I just feel so empty.

Lord,
Complete me.

With love,
Always