Green

Things have been changing
all around me

I grew complacent with
where we were in our lives
I loved you.
I trusted in the normalcy
that we had fallen into.

And I guess
nothing can ever
happen the same way twice
and nothing
can ever stay stagnant
but I thought maybe we could
live within our castle walls

Safe.
In stasis.

But we've changed.

Life rearranged.

We're different people
than we once were.

I look at you
with sober eyes
wondering
how we got here
how we came so far.

You came down
from your high
and looked back
at me
with the same green eyes
that have pierced my
soul
so many times
and wondered
how
time got away
from us.

And as we fall
into each other
at the end of each day
we cling
tooth
and nail
to the hope
that we are enough.
For each other.
For ourselves.

Happy

Because when it came down to it

I knew we couldn't stay as we were

I knew we couldn't exist in 

a stasis that fluctuated 

like the raging seas

as dark skies and

roaring thunder approaches.

Because when it came down to it

I knew we could never be happy.  

Who

If not me

Then

Who?

If we fall apart

Then we fall together.

If we are broken

Then we will be pieced back

As one.

If she is alone

She will be surrounded

By love

And will be comforted.

If not us

Then there is nothing

That can bring us back.

If not me

Then

You tell me

-Who?

The Sins for which I must Atone

I was born

In the fires

Of tragedy

Delivered

Unto this world

In the pools

Of sorrow

And horrific suffering

Tantalized

Into thinking

I am worthy of

A shot at happiness

When it’s torn from

My hands so quickly

That I am left

Once again

Drowning.

I was born

In the pools

Of regrets and

If onlys

Only able to shake my head

And ask what it is

That I must atone for

Because

What have I done?

What is it that led me here?

My arms

And hands

Grasp in the water around me

For leverage

But there is nothing.

Darkness has fallen

Upon my soul.

-

Smothered

There's a weight in my chest that smothers me as I breathe.

I'm choking and choking

On the thought of where

We go from here.

I'm blinded by a fear

That fogs visions

And my thoughts

And I just want to drown

In the madness around me.

I want to let go.

I want to wake up

From this sick nightmare

Because this phantom

Sitting on my chest

Is smothering the life

Out of me.

I just want to go home.

I just

Want to go

Home.

Clarity

The sky
once
ominous
-threatening-
is clear
with beautiful
reds, blues,
and purples
spanning like the waves
on a beach
and the sand
that's been washed
clean. 

The Ominous Horizon

The day begins
to break
as our
words
fade into
the solitude
of night

Our Night
Mother
weeps quietly
at the words
that
were whispered
-the wounds
left undressed-

The sting
of the fiery
sun
exposes
past sins
forgotten
in the well
of everlasting
time

And yet
we emerge
unbroken.
Shattered.
But
untouched.